The promo begins with a camera focussed on a television screen showing a video playback of one of American Freebear’s WWA matches.
The screen is paused and the camera zooms out to reveal an editing suite with more than one screen, but the paused playback is on the largest screen found at the centre of a matrix of 10 screens. As the camera zooms away John Dionysus, sat at a desk facing the screens, is revealed to the viewer. The man who came so close to claiming the WWA Heavyweight Championship turns to face the camera, puts down a remote control he has been holding, and begins his chat.
“I sit here reflecting over the events of the WWA’s comeback super card at Monday Meltdown. Aye, there’s the rub: I cannot remember a thing. My memory has total blackout whenever I try to recall the events that transpired. Maybe someone hit me a little too hard on the head and knocked off a few brain cells."
Pause
"So I question the few people I know that I might call friends, individuals whose testimony I can usually rely upon, but still nothing. Either no-one is talking or everyone is in the same situation as me. It is quite the quandary. I feel like I’ve entered the Twilight Zone or the Bermuda Triangle.”
“But all is not lost, I tell myself. We live in an age of advanced technology, where big televised events such as this are recorded on digital film and stored in the deep recesses of some computerized database right here in WWA Headquarters. So here I came, a few sweet words with Suzie at the reception desk and I’m inside an editing suite within WWA’s media centre. There must surely be something here that will tell me what happened at Meltdown, or give me some clue that will set me on the path to discovery. But there is nothing. I have searched high and low; I’ve followed file hierarchy after file hierarchy; I even deployed that annoying little paper clip, but I still am no closer to knowing the specific details of that historic event in Utah.”
“However, one thing I can ascertain is that I am not the WWA Heavyweight Champion; but neither is any other member of the WWA roster. You see, I have received a message from WWA CEO Andy Seeley to let me know I will be facing American Freebear on the next edition of Meltdown with the still vacant title on the line. Through the darkness the light still shines, but not with so much clarity or penetrability.”
Dionysus pauses and strokes the thickening stubble on his chin for a few seconds before continuing his monologue.
“So I turn my attention to American Freebear and the challenge this week. I am going to assume that whatever took place in Utah wasn’t conducive to long-term mental stability; a collision of epic proportions between, it seems, an unstoppable force and an immovable object. The lack of forthcoming from American Freebear suggests to me that he too suffered at least much as I did. But the force of clarity assumes that it was I and the bear that were the last two men standing, unless there is a strange form of justice being pursued in the WWA.”
Another pause, another slow stroke of stubble.
“Now this is the part where I turn my attention to my opponent, and, according to convention, verbally dissect American Freebear, but saving us all from the unnecessary veterinary puns I shall refrain.”
Dionysus stops again to thoughtfully ponder over the choice of his next words.
“If I speak plainly I will say that such unpleasantness would be utterly noxious. I don’t see the wrestling industry as a place overflowing with mutual respect, but, and this is the truth, I have a whole lot of it for American Freebear. Not the ‘we’re all one and the same’ kind of respect, but the respect owed to a competitor who merits it, and by my book any man who weighs in at 328lbs and has the in-ring effect of an H-bomb merits respect.”
“What has become clear, if nothing else, about Meltdown is that you, American Freebear, and I are the future of this company. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t say this with any sort of misplaced arrogance, but in light of the cold hard fact that we are both joint number one contenders for the company’s most honoured prize. Evidently, it was you and I that fought our way through the entire WWA roster and at the end of the night could not be separated.”
Dionysus stops speaking again and turns his attention to the desk and picks up a book. He looks it over, peruses a few pages and then rests it on his lap. He continues:
“In the many works of Nietzsche the reader finds what commentators have dubbed a ‘philosophy of power’: a vision of a strong man who can overcome the yoke of society’s ‘slave morality’; the hypothetical ubermensch who lives beyond the edge of society’s constraints; a being of pure moral artistry; a man-become-God, whose ‘strength’ will be an inspiration to all enquirers of truth, but the envy of the ‘weak’.”
“While I do not share Nietzsche’s megalomania, I do see some of the merits in his conception of Zarathustra, his ubermensch. My understanding is that the WWA’s future is a fragile one, and what it needs right now is a strong leader of the roster: someone who will set the standard that everyone else should follow. Plainly it appears there are but two candidates: you and me.”
Another pause (again for effect).
“I know that you, American Freebear, give little weight to my meticulous approach to matches, but I’m not here to speak of petty grievances or differences of opinion. However, what analysis has shown to me is that prior to Meltdown no other WWA wrestler had made as much impact, in the ring I should add, and accumulated as much momentum in the months leading up the show as you. That is worthy of attention, and it requires respect.”
“Yet, here I sit, and, yet, the fate of the WWA Heavyweight Championship remains undetermined. So for all your impact and all your momentum, there remains one object you have yet to roll over. I respect you American Freebear, and that is why I want to beat you. Nay, that is why I am determined to beat you and become the beacon of light this ailing company needs and deserves.”
“It is not my aim to sit here and call out names or trade insults; I have no intention of spouting catchphrases and serving up some lazy caricature. It is just not my way to misappropriate words, or to serve up a closer interpretation of your ‘larger than life’ metaphor. Instead I call you out to the centre of the ring, in the manner of the warriors of the ancients, and we settle this in exactly the way the fans pay to see such matters settled: a battle of strength and will that ends with a one-two-three and the arm of the better warrior raised to the glory of the masses.”
The promo ends as the camera fades to black.